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<b>hi curious github user skimming through my page's source code</b>
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<br>
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this markdown document may not be displayed properly because i have added custom """formatting""" that regular or github markdown doesn't have
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<br>
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consider viewing this document on my github pages instead!
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</p>
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...everyone who has interacted with me had thoughts like that.\
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<spanclass="mutter">if not all then at least one of those</span>
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and yes, i'm all of those.
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i don't know what's wrong with me, but i struggle *a lot* with:
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- figuring out what to say to other people without bothering them\
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<spanclass="mutter">this is why i don't talk to anyone before talking to them. like, imagine, some idiot hitting your Discord DMs at a very inconvenient time and then start talking about something you don't fucking care about. wouldn't that just be really really annoying to you?</span>
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- talking about myself\
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<spanclass="mutter">i don't really have anything to say about myself. i was raised in a poor family, and i am still poor so i didn't really have the luxury to enjoy whatever everyone else enjoyed in life, so i had to skip out on **everything fun in life**. so if you ask me what video games i had played, the list i would give you wouldn't be a lot since i couldn't afford a good gaming setup to run most **fun** games. if you asked me what hobbies i enjoy, well yeah i didn't really have the oppotunity to discover those either so i just tell people i like programming or listening to music or "drawing art" or whatever since they're the only fun things i can do for **free**.</span>
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- being not stupid\
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<spanclass="mutter">sorry. i'm very stupid. i honestly can't comprehend a lot of topics that normal people throw at each other all the time. i don't know anything.</span>
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- being not quiet in public\
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<spanclass="mutter">i'm scared. i'm really scared. i'm scared of what people think of me. they judge me by every word i speak. if i say something wrong it's just over for me. i think about that in my head every single time i try to speak out (sometimes i do lash out because of my emotions so i don't always think of that) and the fear just takes over so i just end up not saying anything.</span>
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- and more that i can't think about right now...
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i know this list of excuses isn't enough to justify how terrible of a person i am.\
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if you have thought of me so, i just ask you to please forgive me. i'm sorry.
<b>hi curious github user skimming through my page's source code</b>
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<br>
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this markdown document may not be displayed properly because i have added custom """formatting""" that regular or github markdown doesn't have
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<br>
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consider viewing this document on my github pages instead!
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</p>
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i don't really have a good reason to tell you about why i picked "evelyn"\
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<spanclass="mutter">i picked it because it sounded cute</span>
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but "nightshade" is deliberate. see [List of plants with symbolism, search "nightshade"](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_plants_with_symbolism) for more information.
<b>hi curious github user skimming through my page's source code</b>
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<br>
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this markdown document may not be displayed properly because i have added custom """formatting""" that regular or github markdown doesn't have
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<br>
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consider viewing this document on my github pages instead!
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</p>
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i play only a selection of games. because i'm picky <spanclass="mutter">and broke.</span>\
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<spanclass="mutter">my gaming "setup" is not that good. if you wanna buy me games, don't buy me over the top games that don't run on garbage laptops (which is like **all of the games on the market nowadays**, to be honest.)</span>
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-`sillyevie` on minecraft <spanclass="mutter">(you can find me on [hypixel](https://hypixel.net))</span>
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-`daydreamyevie` on roblox
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- terraria <spanclass="mutter">(i don't actually have the game. i'm just **pretending to play it**, if you know what i mean.)</span>
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-`EvelynXII` on steam:
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- stardew valley <spanclass="mutter">(my friend bought it for me! but it's boring to play alone..)</span>
<b>hi curious github user skimming through my page's source code</b>
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<br>
@@ -10,43 +10,19 @@ path: '/'
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consider viewing this document on my github pages instead!
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</p>
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do you know [me](/me)? i probably don't know [you](/you).
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\
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again, my name is *evelyn nightshade*. it's a really odd name, but it's [one that i gave myself](https://youtube.com/watch?v=eoq2e4h_avs). if that's a mouthful for you, you can call me *evie*. anyways, let's move on with the introductions.\
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am <spanplaceholdertype="age"> years old.\
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i'm a girl who really really loves procrastination. chronically tired, occasionally wired.\
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\
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because of that i haven't been doing anything of value.\
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i'd just randomly get an idea for something cool and get in the mood to make it happen\
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<spanclass="rapid">and then put it off immediately</span> because i'm *"doing something else"* or just don't have time for it.\
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\
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then later when i do have time, i'm just not in the mood anymore. so nothing ever ends up happening.\
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\
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i used to be obsessed with tinkering with web technologies but i've lost interest since a while ago (probably for the same reason?)\
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\
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\
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it's a miracle i'm even making this webpage right now .
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> <spanmodifiertype="dialogue"></span> *hey evie! hi evie! isn't this supposed to be the index page? where's the list of pages?*
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shut the <spanclass="angry">angry HELL</span> up! <spanclass="mutter">when did i ever let YOU speak? who even are you? get out of here!!!</span>\
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**anyways** they're in that submenu accessible through the menu button on the top right of the page .\
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i don't have a good design for a nav thingy yet so you get that for now.
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> <spanmodifiertype="dialogue"></span> *why is this webpage so damn empty?? blahblahblahblah*
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<spanclass="angry">because i haven't figured out what to add yet okay shut UP you're so-</span>\
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whoops lost my composure there! anyways this webpage is to remain mostly empty until i figure out what to add to it. goodbye!
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> <spanmodifiertype="dialogue"></span> *but you haven't told me anything meaningful about yourself yet!*
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i'm chronically online! you can almost always reach me through discord <spanclass="mutter">(encyclopedic)</span>.\
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\
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you can also find me on *minecraft* <spanclass="mutter">(sillyevie)</span>.\
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yes i **DO** play minecraft sometimes. yes i play on hypixel.\
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\
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you **CAN** also find me on roblox <spanclass="mutter">(daydreamyevie)</span>\
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note that i do not have my joins on and if you friend me randomly there is a non zero but **VERY** low chance that i will hear you out.\
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\
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here's a post about [what music i listen to](/music). you can also click on it on the nav panel.
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\
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<spanclass="love">that's all i have to say for now! cya next time!</span>
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my name is [evelyn nightshade](/evelyn-nightshade). if that's too long for you, here are some other alternative names that you can call me by:
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- evelyn
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- evie (my main nickname)
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- ms. nightshade
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-[that one loner and quiet and stupid and boring girl](/alone-and-quiet-and-stupid-and-boring) who longs for nothing more than companionship and peace
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i'm <spanplaceholdertype="age"></span>. my pronouns are [she/her](/gender).
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yes i do listen to [music](/music). [music](/music) is great! though my taste might not overlap with yours.
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why yes i do play [games](/games). thank you for asking.
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and yes i do have a [web 1.0 badge thingy](/web-badges). don't think anyone would ever embed it anywhere but here you go.
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... ~~you can find them [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7Gfvs4A320zPRQG1DG51nx), on spotify.~~\
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<spanclass="mutter">(edit) i'm no longer using this playlist; i'm now making a playlist monthly to put stuff that i'm currently interested in since that's not possible with the current singular playlist approach</span>
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> <spanmodifiertype="dialogue"></span> *evie, spotify **fucking** sucks! why aren't you using something else?????*
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yes i know spotify may not be the most upright company but there are not that many good alternatives for me right now <spanclass="mutter">(has to be a streaming service with an expansive library + be easy and not take a thousand years to transfer my privated 1k+ songs playlist from spotify to it)</span>.
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~~but if for some reason you don't wanna click on that link~~ here are some songs i like the most ~~in that playlist~~:
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